Répondez S'il Vous Plaît... The Event RSVP

Photo courtesy of todayifoundout.com

RSVP.  It is a simple request under the guise of an elegant language.  Please respond.  As an event planner, I know first hand the importance of this simple request: guest count needed and needed in advance - a confirmation for food, place settings, seating, favors, and the list goes on.  Hence the "reply by" date usually always listed.  


Yet, I recently found myself responsible for several "past due" RSVPs.  As I sifted through the mail that had been collecting on my kitchen counter I felt a rising sense of guilt.  Sure, the new baby and the new schedule contributed; but prior to motherhood, I was still late on my RSVPs.  What was my excuse then?  


On the flip side, in planning events I've noticed a consistent struggle in getting people to RSVP.  Inevitably, there are personal phone calls, emails and even mentions on social media used to remind, and remind... and remind invitees.  I certainly than, have no excuse for being late on my RSVPs.  As I also know first hand the frustration that can follow in not being totally sure of your guest count and of course, having to plan for those few who will not RSVP, but will attend.   Never mind those who will simply not acknowledge the invite.


As I made these "past due" replies, I pondered my own failure to respond in an appropriate time frame and my experience with others.  In fact, in doing some reading on the matter, several sources indicate that up to 50% of invitations with an RSVP go...well...un-RSVP'ed.  I am not alone.


I wonder, why is that?  With the roles that email, texting and social media have taken in our every day lives, I wonder if the RSVP has become less formal.  With the now commonly used Facebook event, sites like Evite or even the basic Outlook Calendar request, I ask, are we bombarded with so many RSVP requests that the perceived importance of replying has diminished?  Or are we simply preoccupied with life that these requests get forgotten in the every day shuffle? 


Think about it.  It is not just the occasional wedding invite that might unfortunately get left behind in the pile of mail.  It's the endless chain of (some seemingly random) Facebook happenings, networking e-blasts, personal occasions and meeting requests that are looking for us to "please respond".  Will I attend, am I a "maybe" or am I sending regrets?  And to think, there are days I can't even decide what I want for lunch. 


Regardless of the cause, the reality is that replying for an event that is requesting your attendance should be an honor.  You are invited, after all.  Someone wants to share with you a special moment, a celebration or just plain spend time in your company.  And the reality is that replying for an event that is requesting your attendance is easy.  With wedding invitations, the reply card is simply awaiting your name and a check mark next to the line indicating your intentions - the envelope is provided, addressed and stamped.  In other instances it is a simple click of a button and the use of your computer-savvy skills.  Or there is the phone call and email response, both taking only a few moments to complete.  


Myself included - I say it's time to reclaim the RSVP.  Let's not let the importance fade away in what feels like an increasingly casual society.  Respond right away, put a reminder in your calendar, place the invite in a location that can be easily referenced... whatever it is you need to do to make it happen. Répondez S'il Vous Plaît... just please respond.


More to come on RSVP etiquette. 


Kate Sepe joins Let's Party Magazine.com as the Event Trends Blogger with a background in nonprofit event planning and management. Kate is currently a Special Events Manager with the National Kidney Foundation of Arizona. Kate is a board member with the International Special Events Society (ISES) of Arizona. She expresses a true love and passion for the event industry and is thankful for the opportunity to share unique ideas and popular trends with readers.